The following is another brief excerpt from my yet unpublished memoir, “Muckville: Farm Policy, Media and the Strange Oddities of Semi-Rural Life.” It deals with then Secretary of Agriculture Dan Glickman meeting with Eve and I in 1998 in the U.S. Capitol.

But a few days after the press conference Rep. Gilman’s office called Eve and me and to tell us a meeting had been set with Secretary. Glickman in the Capitol for Friday June 19th, 1998. They asked if Eve and I could come down to the meeting … we said “absolutely.” Ray Myruski was also invited to attend and he did as well.

Eve and I drove down to Washington, D.C. with Caleb. Caleb was only about 14 months old and we were a bit worried about how he would do during all this. We had a pre-meeting scheduled in Representative. Gilman’s office and the meeting proper was to be held in the actual U.S. Capitol building. We came well prepared. Prior to the meeting Eve created detailed spreadsheets which fully demonstrated how poor the policies were, especially the buy-up policies. We also had the insurance documents which showed how our expected market price was set at the absurdly low figure of $4.85 per hundred weight in 1996 (the 5-year Olympic average (’93-’97) for onions in New York, according to the marketing year average price data, compiled by NASS, is $12.93 cwt., the 10-year olympic average (’88-’97) was $14.96 cwt). Since we were forced to obtain a USDA Emergency loan (EM) after 1996 we had the loan application documents with us. Those documents included materials on what our onion crop should be valued at and those loan documents used a figures of over $21.00 per hundred weight. We also brought with us all of the letters that we had either received directly from USDA officials or indirectly via Congressman Gilman’s office. All of this material would come into play during the meeting.

At the time of this meeting Representative Gilman was Chair of the House International Relations Committee. He had been serving on the committee (and its forerunner) for years, and had numerous knick- knacks and other such items all throughout his office. Caleb, who was a walking toddler, had a big blue cooking spoon which was at the time his favorite toy. During the pre-meeting in Gilman’s office Caleb began to walk about, happily swinging the big blue spoon wherever we went.

All Eve and I could think was “Oh my God … he is going to destroy some trinket given to the Congressman from the people of Botswana.” Gilman, and his staff, appeared to care less and thought Caleb was one of the best behaved children they had ever come across. Have I mentioned that Representative Gilman is one of the sweetest, nicest men on earth?

After the meeting in Gilman’s office we all marched to the Capitol. The meeting was held in one of the large conference rooms. Because a member of the cabinet and a member of Congress was attending the meeting the doors were guarded by both a Secret Service agent and a plain clothes Capitol Police officer. At times during the meeting Caleb got fussy and Eve had to take him outside. We have some pretty funny pictures of him being held by the Secret Service agent and running down the hall with his big blue spoon.

The meeting was attended by Eve and Caleb and me, Congressman Gilman, his wonderful wife Georgia and his staff, and Ray Myruski, from our side. Secretary Glickman entered the room with a herd, including:

August (Gus) Schumacher, Under Secretary – Farm and Foreign Agricultural ServicesDave Carlin, Office of the Secretary, Congressional Liaison Richard Newman, FSA Deputy Administrator for Farm Programs John Newcomer, Program Specialist – FSA, Emergency & NAP Michael Hand, Director of Claims and Underwriting Services Division, RMA

And there were others from USDA. Also in attendance was Senator Al D’Amato’s staffer Peter Phipps.

The only people that spoke during this meeting were Eve and I, Representative Gilman, Secretary Glickman and Michael Hand. Eve and I knew of Hand but this was the first time we had met him in person. We now consider ourselves good friends. Eve and I had a nickname for him, “The Prince of Darkness.” He epitomized all the reasons as to why the federal crop insurance was so bad (farmers in Texas would refer to him, not so affectionately, as “Dr. No.” No matter what they asked him to do his response was always “NO NO NO!”). The meeting, though scheduled to be a half hour, went on for over an hour. As I said, if the June 6th press conference was my “coming out party” for the media, this meeting was my “coming out party” in terms of public policy advocacy.

After introductory remarks by everyone we got down to business. Essentially Eve and I for our side and Glickman and Hand did most of the talking. Hand started by lamenting that certain other individuals he had dealt with previously were not there….  I said to him “they aren’t here, I am.” We got into the meat of the discussion quite quickly. I first stated how irritated I was that USDA officials kept calling “CAT” coverage “free” and either outright stating or implying that because the onion farmers were too cheap to buy the buy-up policies we essentially got what we deserved. Glickman got angry and said, “CAT isn’t free, the taxpayers are paying for it.” I responded with, “that’s right Mr. Secretary, it’s part of a $2 billion dollar appropriation, we may just pay an administrative fee, but a premium is being paid, just not by us, but it isn’t ‘free.” He then asked, “well, who is saying this?” And I then pointed to about 3 people in the room and said “he did, he did, and he did. I have the letters with me … would you like to see them?”

The look on his face and their faces was priceless. Eve then jumped in and hit him on the buy-up issue. She produced her detailed spreadsheets, gave him copies and said, “look Mr. Secretary, can you see with “Stages” alone how valueless this policy is. In reality for every $1 paid in premiums the best you can do is get either $2 to $4 in coverage.” Glickman was stunned. I then asked him, “what kind of fool would buy insurance like this?” And he paused for a moment and said, “not me.” And I replied, “not me either. This is why I and virtually every other farmer doesn’t buy the buy-up.”

We talked about “Production to Count.” Eve said to Glickman, “Here’s the way to look at it, the policy subtracts from what it covers what it doesn’t cover.” I added, “it’s like this, if you get in a wreck with your car and your insurance company says, ‘oh, we can’t pay you anything because your other car is fine and its value wipes out your claim.’ And you respond, ‘but you don’t cover that other car’ and they respond with ‘too bad.’ That’s what is happening here.” Glickman had nothing to say. We touched on the absurd expected market price. We showed him how it was set at $4.85 per hundred weight in 1996, yet the same USDA in setting the value of our crop for loan purposes had a document in the EM loan packet that valued the crop at prices as high as $21.40 per hundred weight. And as I showed him those documents I said, “That’s a neat trick. For insurance purposes your USDA says are onions are worth $4.85 per l00 lbs but for loan purposes they are worth $21.00. Imagine if you walked in a car dealership and went to buy a car and they tell you for loan purposes it’s worth $50,000 but for insurance purposes it’s worth $5,000 … how would you feel about that?” He sort of mumbled something that he wouldn’t like it and I snapped “you’d have the person doing that arrested, wouldn’t you?” And he nodded his head in agreement.

But from our perspective the point of the meeting wasn’t a bitch session, it was to get stuff done, to make positive changes and improvements. And Eve and I had specific proposals, tangible, realistic ways to address and fix these problems. And as we started outlining Mike Hand would say, “oh no Mr. Secretary, you can’t do this” or “oh no Mr. Secretary, you can’t do that.” And he kept telling Glickman what he could and couldn’t do. And after 5th or 6th time I interrupted Hand and said:

“Wait a minute, I thought you (I pointed at Glickman) were the political appointee … not you (I pointed at Hand). With all due respect Mr. Secretary, you sit there appointed by the President, it’s up to you to tell him what you can and will do, not the other way around. And heck, you are appointed by the President, you have the power to make the sun shine, to make rain fall from the clouds, if you so desire.”

I said it sort of with a smile on my face. Glickman chuckled and nodded in agreement. The meeting ended back talking about how inappropriate it was for USDA officials to characterize CAT as free or cheap and it was the onion farmers’ own fault for their current predicament, because they didn’t buy what we all seemingly acknowledged was a worthless buy-up policy. Glickman seriously pronounced that “I assure you that from this day forward you won’t have USDA officials saying or implying that.” We happily shook hands and the proverbial “politician holding the baby” pictures were taken. Rep. Gilman’s wonderful wife gave me a big squeeze afterwards and said something like “you’re such a good boy” and “you did a great job.” We ended with promises to continue to work on this problem and fix it.

The lawsuit and my “Dan Glickman is the human safety net piece” never came up … though I had it with me.

On the way home Eve and I wondered how long it would take for someone from the USDA to say “CAT was free or cheap” and blame us wrongly for being in the situation we were in.

We didn’t think it would take a day or two. We were, sadly, wrong.

End of memoir except.

Addendum:

Back on April 8 2013 the U.S. Senate Democrats held a Rural Summit meeting on the Hill

http://www.dsoc.senate.gov/2013/04/08/senate-democrats-to-host-rural-summit-former-agriculture-secretary-glickman-to-keynote-3/

Each Democratic Senator got to invite two individuals and I was one of 2 people that Senator Chuck Schumer chose. I was there representing the State, our community and our industry. Glickman was the keynote speaker so at the end of the event I waited in line to speak with him.

When I got my chance the first thing I did was show him the picture of him holding Caleb back in 1998. When I showed him the picture he remembered and laughed. We chatted for a few minutes about that meeting and what happened afterwards. I briefly discussed the onion policy and how screwed up it was. We then parted ways.

Back in 1998 we both had more hair, but my loss was more substantial.

A few weeks ago I was contacted by Eve and I’s longtime and dear friend, Pat O’Dwyer. She had been at a function in Syracuse and happened to speak with a staffer from the NYS Comptroller’s Office, Kyle Seeley. Kyle not only works for the Comptroller, he happens to also have grown up in Orange County and went to the Minisink School system. Kyle happened to mention to Pat that the Comptroller, Tom DiNapoli (http://www.osc.state.ny.us/about/bio.htm) is very interested in learning more about agriculture in NYS. Pat responded, “I have the place he needs to go and the people he needs to meet.” Pat quickly called me and said that I would be soon receiving a call from Kyle. She asked if I would be interested in working on a tour and hosting the Comptroller on our farm. I responded, “you must be joking.” Lol! Of course I was thrilled for such an opportunity.

A few days later Kyle called me. We set up a day and time where he could come and meet me and start to talk about a tour. About a week later, in the midst of planting, Kyle arrived. I was very impressed with him. He was very knowledgeable, enthusiastic and energetic. I told him that I subscribe to the Comptroller’s weekly e-mail and I greatly appreciate his yearly summary of the economic importance of agriculture in NYS. He told me that the Comptroller would like to learn more facts and details about farming, first hand, from farmers across the state. With this information he and his office could then examine ways in which they could do more in behalf of agriculture in NYS. I took Kyle on a tour and introduced him to a fellow farmer friend of mine. We then talked about the tour Assemblyman Skoufis did last year (see: https://muckville.com/2014/06/19/assemblyman-james-skoufis-agricultural-tour-for-his-colleagues-from-the-nys-assembly/). I suggested a similar, if not scaled down tour. I thought it would be quite informative in the Comptroller could visit the Alamo and health clinic as well as the ABCD center in the Village of Florida. Kyle agreed. I connected Kyle with my dear friend Katherine Brieger (http://clinicians.org/about-us/board-of-directors/katherine-brieger-rd-cde/) the Executive Director of the Planetree Training Institute-HRHCare, who graciously contacted the staff of the ABCD center in terms of checking on their availability to host a tour. I also connected Kyle with our Cornell Cooperative Extension Agriculture Program Leader Maire (pronounced Mary) Ullrich (https://www.linkedin.com/pub/maire-ullrich/2/409/26b) who knows all things-Orange County agriculture. Kyle then came down, met Kathy in person and did a walk through tour of the Alamo and the ABCD school. With everything set we chose the date of May 18th. It turned out that I was able to take off from doing farm work on the 18th (I sprayed one tank of herbicides in the morning but dad and my brother Brian did the 2nd and 3rd tanks on their own) and join the tour from the start at the Alamo.

Initially we planned for a lunch at the world famous Quaker Creek Store (http://www.quakercreekstore.com) but a schedule change for the Comptroller did not allow that. Instead when we visited my farm we were able to offer a small platter which contained some of Quaker Creek’s best products.

The tour started at the Farmworker Community Center known as the “Alamo” (http://www.hrhcare.org/the-farmworkers-community-center). The Comptroller was joined by Kyle and Special Assistant for External Affairs Darrel Aubertine. Eve and I are big fans of Darrel. Before he was in this position he was Governor Cuomo’s first Commissioner Of Agriculture and Markets. Prior to that he was a member of the NYS Assembly and State Senate and Chair of the Senate Agriculture Committee. He has been a fierce advocate and defender of NYS agriculture and in particular took on some very misinformed self appointed farmworker advocates. Eve and I and many farmers will always be very appreciative of the stand he took and efforts he made in our behalf.

Now, I have to mention that I have a former high school and college friend who works as a lobbyist for a firm in Albany. When Mr. DiNapoli was a member of the Assembly she frequently lobbied his office and met with him. When I told her he was coming to my farm she remarked “in the mess of Albany Tom DiNapoli is truly one of the good guys. This was a sentiment I heard echoed by numerous people, including Pat, Assemblyman Skoufis, amongst many others.

The event started in a meeting room at the Alamo. Darrel arrived first. The last time I had seen him in person was on my neighbor and friend John Glebocki’s farm (http://www.glebockifarms.com) in 2011 when the Governor toured the devastated farms after the flooding caused by Hurricane Irene and Tropical Storm Lee (http://www.twcnews.com/archives/nys/hudson-valley/2011/09/22/cuomo-visits-area-hit-hard-by-storms-NY_558038.old.html). Numerous staff of Hudson River Health attended, including longtime Alamo Director Stash Grajewski (see the article on the Alamo: http://warwickinfo.net/floridaonion/TFODec2009web.pdf). The numerous health and dental and outreach services offered to the migrant farmworker community were detailed (http://www.hrhcare.org/healthcenters/goshen-the-alamo/). Both Darrel and the Comptroller listened intently and asked very insightful questions.

After the discussion a walking tour of both the Alamo and the clinic commenced.

After we left the Alamo we moved on to the ABCD School in the Village of Florida (http://www.abcdny.org/sites/default/files/profiles/2011/ABCD%20at%20Florida%20Profile%20Fact%20Sheet%202011.pdf). The staff first provided an informative briefing regarding the services they provide and some of the challenges they face, including in terms of staff retention. I brought the proposal to forgive college loans in NYS if someone enters farming as a career (http://wamc.org/post/part-five-student-loan-series-focuses-young-farmers & http://wamc.org/post/student-loan-series-update-young-farmer-reaps-good-news)and asked why can’t the same be done if someone chose to enter the career path of working for one of these childcare centers. The Comptroller detailed how when he was in the Assembly he worked on a similar proposal. We both said we would reach out to Assemblyman Skoufis about this.

A tour of the facility then commenced.

After the tour The Comptroller, Darrel and Kyle and I made a quick stop to one of my fields down Indiana Road. i showed him some of the damage we have suffered recently, thanks to the recent excessive dryness and heat. I also briefly discussed the current debt Eve and I carry and the daily financial struggles we face as small family farmers.

I also related to Tom a certain detail found in my yet to be published memoir “Muckville: Farm Policy, Media and the Strange Oddities of Semi-Rural Life!” I related how a primary point of my book is how despite the odds and problems with our current system there are many good legislators and government bureaucrats who strive to do right by the people. and if you work hard, and know what you are doing, you can effect beneficial and positive change for your community. A linchpin of this is the integrity of the players and the system. In his position of Comptroller he is one of the persons who ensures that integrity and I thanked him for his efforts in that area. They are very much appreciated.

We then headed to our farm. Maire set up before our arrival a table with some of Quaker Creek’s finest products. Not only did Maire join us but so did our good friend, Orange County Farm Bureau President and local mixed vegetable farmer John Lupinski. John too is one of the good guys who puts in tireless efforts in behalf of the local farming community. I gave Tom and Darrel a brief tour of the farm, including the many photos found in our farm office. One photo included the montage of officials we have met over the years.

He and Darrel also noticed Annie Rabbit’s recognition of me that hangs on the wall (https://muckville.com/2014/01/10/assemblywoman-annie-rabbitts-resolution-recognizing-my-efforts-on-behalf-of-onion-farmers-and-the-onion-farming-industry-in-new-york-state/). Both Tom and Darrel served with Annie in the Assembly and we all had high praise for her and her dedicated service in behalf of her constituents.

I also discussed a history of the region (https://muckville.com/2013/11/30/national-geographic-november-1941story-on-the-historic-black-dirt-region-of-orange-county-new-york/) and of my family (https://muckville.com/2014/01/11/a-tour-for-princeton-students-and-a-little-bit-of-family-history-about-my-great-grandparents-frank-julia-pawelski/ & https://muckville.com/2014/12/20/fantastic-8mm-movies-that-stretch-back-to-the-1930s/). I also related what makes our soil so special (http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/24/dining/24onio.html).

I have to say I was totally impressed with how closely the Comptroller listened to what you had to say. This wasn’t a perfunctory event. I’ve hosted and attended many such events in the past and frequently it is very obvious that the various politicos aren’t really listening to what you have to say at all. This wasn’t the case with Tom.

While in the office and looking at the montage photo I related to Tom and Darrel the story of how my dad tried to get a “full hug, with a pat and a sway” from Senator Gillibrand when she visited our farm in 2010 (https://muckville.com/2014/01/03/a-caption-in-the-university-of-iowa-alumni-publication-the-stories-behind-it/). Around fifteen minutes later Eve came out (he had heard a number of stories about Eve) and joined us. After introductions she and Tom posed for a picture. Why are they laughing in the pictures? Because the Comptroller asked if he was going to get a “full hug.” I nearly fell to the floor laughing.

We then engaged in a small discussion, for nearly an hour, on some of the issues affecting farmers locally and how the Comptroller and his office could help. Maire gave a number of facts and figures related to Orange County farming and detailed some important dairy related issues to the Comptroller. The se issues included the very contentious self-appointed advocate driven labor bill (http://nyfarmworkerprotectionbill.com/index.html & https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpRWyr57qzw), NY Rising, dairy and beef processing, and a proposal to deal with onion culls and a bio digester. many of these projects are potential investments in the farming community. Tom and Darrel listened, and asked great questions.

Caleb and Jonah joined us and I got to brag a bit about Caleb, on how he was accepted to NJIT and awarded essentially a full ride academic scholarship. Caleb plans on studying some form of engineering. I told the group I hoped he would return tot he farm and armed with his degree he could then fix any of our equipment that breaks. Everyone laughed.

I have to say that what I heard about the Comptroller is 100% true. Tom DiNapoli is truly a very nice man. So is his Special Assistant Darrel Aubertine and his staffer Kyle Seeley. They genuinely listened and were eager to find ways to help farmers. It was a fantastic event and it closed with me inviting the Comptroller to ride with me in the army truck as we harvest (https://youtu.be/Oc5mhpBuoW8). He said he may just do that!

The media got it wrong. I have just learned that it was a different onion approp that was vetoed. The $50K remains. My sincere & humble apologies to Governor Cuomo!

This post concludes the 2014 growing season in pictures. Once we finished packing and selling our onions we moved on to field work and finishing insulating our barn.

Please enjoy the pics:

Here is my 4th reply to Nalan … enjoy!

Subject: Re: Hello!

From: Chris Pawelski 

Date: January 26, 2015 at 12:24:18 PM EST

To: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

Dearest Nalan,

First, thank you for sending me the new pics as well as the minutia of certain aspects of your existence.

My first question … are you cooking onion in the one picture? I sincerely hope so. They are extremely good for your digestive system!

You live with mom and dad? No way! Anton I hope never calls Gika a dingbat or threatens to send her to the moon!

Money is not the most important aspect of life. Though it is quite important, according to the British philosopher Pink Floyd. As Mr. Floyd once said:

Money it’s a gas
Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash
New car, caviar, four star daydream,
Think I’ll buy me a football team
Money get back
I’m all right Jack keep your hands off my stack.

http://youtu.be/-0kcet4aPpQ

What do you think about that poetry?

If you were to climb into a mailbox that has to be a pretty big mailbox … like this:

That one you could fit in for sure!

You concluded your e-mail by asking:

“For what purpose do you start dating on the web to me? You just want to be friends or looking for your soul mate? I’m tired of being lonely and looking for a serious relationship, I dream of a good family with good loving husband, a reliable partner in life. Maybe I want too much? But I still believe in love. I want you to trust me and I think that we should be honest with each other. I’m waiting for answers to my questions. This concludes the letter. It is waiting for your answer.”

First, you contacted me! Second, I too believe people should be honest between each other. I especially appreciate honesty from internet suitors that look remarkably similar to hot Hungarian porn stars! But … I digress. Why am I continuing to speak with you? Remember in my last e-mail when I said this:

Currently I am working on a very important/special project. You see, I fear that our entire planet and existence on planet earth is threatened by a dangerous temporal anomaly! You see, time travel research must take place so that centuries down the road we have trained time traveling soldiers and technicians who can deal with any threats to our current time line. To do this time travel research needs to be funded now. I firmly believe that I am the person that funds it. But I am currently broke. I needs funds to do this. So I am pleading with legitimate time travelers to get to me winning Powerball numbers, so I can amass a huge fortune and fund time travel research. This isn’t about me getting rich, this is about protecting the timeline and humanity being the dominant life form on the planet.

Well, here is the honest truth. I really am a time traveler. Here are pictures of me suiting up and prepping to engage in a temporal jump:

When you successfully return from a time jump you typically land on the top of Ford Bronco:

I am currently stuck in a very dangerous temporal paradox that threatens all of mankind … not just now but in the past and thousands of years in the future. You see, though I am currently making jumps in time, time travel research has not been funded now. That means with a lack of funding time travel research will not take place and not lead to the creation of the “Titor Device:

http://beforeitsnews.com/contributor/upload/343420/images/johntitor_themanwiththemachine.png

Do you get the import of this? I am in a loop and I cannot escape.

Further, I am now dealing with ravenous creatures from the Beta Quadrant. They are from our time but a number of parsecs away. They feed on human flesh, and Cheetos. They pose an incredible treat as well.

Do you know hand to hand combat and can you twerk? The twerking has nothing to do with this other stuff … just curious.

Please reply with what weapons and hand to hand combat training you have and how much working capital you currently posses and can obtain in the near future? Can you obtain technology that will allow you to scramble future transmissions? The National Security Agency has been compromised and is aware of some of these activities.

The following is a coded transmission for my friends in the resistance:

Lavender Blue, Dilly Dilly

Gordie Howe with the hat trick

Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids

If I kill all the golfers they will lock me up and throw away the key

To the Batcave

End of coded transmission

Anxiously awaiting your response!

C

Here it is … my reply will be posted shortly!

Date: January 26, 2015 at 9:02:53 AM EST

From: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

Reply-To: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

To: Chris Pawelski 

Subject: Hello!

Hello! I’m so glad to see that you have written to me! It was very
nice to see from you. I think we will have a long acquaintance. I have
a feeling that I was drawn to your letters. Do you have the same
feeling? I thought a lot about you, and decided that perhaps you can
trust. Today I want to tell you about my family. My father – his name
is Anton, his 63 and he was in the military. Now my father retired, he
was a war all my life. My mother’s name is Gika – her 57 years, she is
now retired, and is engaged in household chores. All her life she
worked on the farm, because he loves animals. I love and respect my
parents. As a child, I, like all children to attend school. I liked at
school, so how could I learn something new. I finished the 11th grade
with honors, receiving a gold medal for academic success. I live with
my parents, and I have my own room. Sometimes I want to have to find a
man and start privacy. So how to live with their parents well, but I
want more freedom. I always have an opinion, and to achieve the very
most. Now look back at that time and I understand that in addition to
the difficulties and hardships life taught me a lot – be independent,
just to achieve in life itself. I’m not one to rely! So I was a good
student, which gave me a chance to go to university itself. I was
educated teacher, so I now work in a profession. A lot of effort spent
on it to learn English, but to me it still needs to improve. Now I
have an interesting job and I am self-sufficient in itself. In the
West, for some reason, there is a misconception that all girls tend to
marry a foreigner because of the money. As if the money – it’s the
most important thing in life. I wonder what you think about this? You
know, I now sorely lacking an understanding person who could hear me
and understand what I feel. I have had a relationship with the guys,
but unfortunately, most of my fans was only sex. They saw me as just
an attractive figure, and no one wanted to know what is in my heart.
As soon as someone I trusted and hoped I changed and broken heart.
That’s why I decided to communicate via the Internet. Perhaps through
correspondence will be able to better understand the man. I am very
glad that you came into my life. I find it interesting to talk to you,
I would climb into your mailbox to read your messages. Tell me,
please, and you have had a relationship with the girls? For what
purpose do you start dating on the web to me? You just want to be
friends or looking for your soul mate? I’m tired of being lonely and
looking for a serious relationship, I dream of a good family with good
loving husband, a reliable partner in life. Maybe I want too much? But
I still believe in love. I want you to trust me and I think that we
should be honest with each other. I’m waiting for answers to my
questions. This concludes the letter. It is waiting for your answer.
Nalan.

This speaks for itself … enjoy!

Subject: Re: Hello!

From: Chris Pawelski

Date: January 24, 2015 at 11:57:42 AM EST

To: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

Hi Nalan,

 

Wow, that was a fast response!

 

That is an interesting school you went to! Pushkin is the name of a character in the James Bond movies. He replaces General Gogol as head of the KGB. Here is the Wiki entry: http://jamesbond.wikia.com/wiki/General_Pushkin

 

I too learned such English words when I first went to school, including table, chair and dog. My first word I ever spoke was “truck.” You and I are like twins we are so similar!

 

I have many workers from latin America so I never fear the accent. Is yours scary? Can you send some sort of voicemail message to me so I can evaluate it?

 

What did you like about me based on my reply to you? Do you mind if I have a wife already? What are you thoughts on that? Can you weed onions and pick out rotten onions on the grading table?

 

In fact, what are you thoughts about onions? Do you eat them? Do you love them? Did you know that they are great for your digestive system, although they may give you bad smelling poopy gas.

 

Yes, you do have quite the beautiful body. In fact, I would say you have the body of a porn star. I hope I am not being too naughty in saying that.

 

Ooh, please send me more photos! I love photo shoots. Do you take selfies too?

 

I do enjoy the side story about your one time photographer now insurance agent with a family friend named Anna! Does he look like a porn star too?

 

I like tv shows and movies too. I also love Bugs Bunny cartoons! They are so real that sometimes I think those cartoons are really documentaries! Do you think they are based on true stories?

 

I hate Madonna! Period! End of discussion!

 

I never go to the bars. My wife won’t let me. I don’t blame her.

 

I currently have 3 cats. I love them!

 

I too greatly admire and respect honest people.

 

Currently I am working on a very important/special project. You see, I fear that our entire planet and existence on planet earth is threatened by a dangerous temporal anomaly! You see, time travel research must take place so that centuries down the road we have trained time traveling soldiers and technicians who can deal with any threats to our current time line. To do this time travel research needs to be funded now. I firmly believe that I am the person that funds it. But I am currently broke. I needs funds to do this. So I am pleading with legitimate time travelers to get to me winning Powerball numbers, so I can amass a huge fortune and fund time travel research.

 

This isn’t about me getting rich, this is about protecting the timeline and humanity being the dominant life form on the planet.

 

What do you know about the gray space aliens? Are your transmissions secure or do I need to scramble them. The NSA is listening.

 

Talk with you soon,

 

C

 

 

Here are more pictures to check out:

 

 

Me at the dentist:

 

 

 

Me driving a truck:

 

 

 

Chloe:

 

 

 

Bauer:

 

 

On Jan 24, 2015, at 10:33 AM, Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com> wrote:

Hello! Thank you for your letter. I’m so glad that you wrote the
letter! I hope to open the mail and see your message. It was nice to
find your letter. I think that we need to learn a lot about each
other. I think you will agree with this. So tell us about yourself a
little more. English I began to learn more before school, about a year
before I went to school. In kindergarten we were taught simple words
such as: table, chair, dog, cat and many other simple words. At the
university I went to the English language more thoroughly. I finished
“Tbilisi Pedagogical Institute named AS Pushkin” in my country’s
capital Tbilisi. My qualification – a teacher of English. I chose the
Faculty of Education, because I was attracted to working with
children. Since high school, I thought that the work of teachers noble
and important work, which I want to do. And then, I love children. I
can speak fluently in English. But sometimes I make mistakes. I have
my difficulties, that would be correct to write. Sometimes I look in
the dictionary, if I can not find the right word. I have concerns
about my accent. Perhaps for you, my focus will be fun. =). You could
tell how you will treat my accent? You will not scare it? It would be
interesting to know what you think about it. I like you already knew
from our correspondence, I love sports. This allows you to be healthy
and keep your body in shape. But it is important for every woman –
many are sitting on a diet, pace yourself to lose a few pounds. To me
this easier, I am engaged in fitness and twice a week I go to the
pool. Therefore, I can say without false modesty that I have a
beautiful body, which I’m not ashamed, unlike many girls with
complexes (there are such, I hope they will not come across). I love
the photo shoot, and if you want, I can send you some of the most
successful in my view photos. Just want to warn you that my photos
will be at the level of a professional. After university, my best
friend, her name is Anna, bought a good camera, and wanted to become a
photographer. So we did a lot of photo session with her, and these
photos we have no one to show, and they were stored on the computer
Anna. My hard drive on the computer recently broke and I lost all my
pictures, so I had a photo taken from Anna. I think you’ll like.
Unfortunately, Anna was not able to become a photographer, because a
lot of competition, so she had to sell the camera in the future. And
now she has a family and children, and it works as an insurance agent.
Please tell me how you feel about the sport, practiced anything? I
spend free time mostly at home, reading books. Very fond of novels and
adventure. I watch soap operas, really like “Interns” is a hilarious
movie about the life of physicians, has just received a diploma and a
trainee in the hospital. From music I like to listen to Madonna, by
her beautiful songs are very incendiary dance! I am pleased to go to
the movies or cafes with friends, love to chat. Although, of course,
sometimes at work so exhausted that no strength to go anywhere. And
how do you spend your leisure time? Perhaps with the guys at the bar?
I think you are interested in my character. Itself is difficult to
assess, but friends say that I am a very quiet person. In people I
value integrity and honesty, and I did not like, if you suddenly find
out that the person lied to me. What are the qualities you like in
people? What is important to you in a woman in the first place? For me
the main thing – that was a good man. Such that he could take care of
others. Do you love cats? Or dogs? Well, now I’ll bombarded with
questions. I am writing you a letter from my friend Anna. She has
access to the Internet, and I’ll write to you from it. I want to make
our acquaintance continued. Maybe sometimes I do not get to answer you
quickly. But I will try to write to you often. Ok? Now I finish the
letter. I am pleased that we continue to chat, I’m waiting for your
letters! Your passionate girlfriend Nalan!!!

Nalan has responded to my reply to “her” … sort of. She actually sent one long paragraph containing all sorts of irrelevant information about all sorts of stuff and didn’t address anything I sent at all. “She” also sent 3 more pics of herself … well, they are of her if she is a doppelgänger of Hungarian porn star Eva Angel. Below is the text of the email and the 3 pics.

How do I know they are pics of Eva? Once again I searched the images via TinEye and Google image search. What I also found were some forum websites that others posted about this same scam. The text of the pitches are a bit different but the pics appear to be the same. Here is one link:

http://www.romancescam.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&p=380065&t=75900

This link is even better because this poor schmuck who started the thread states:

“Hi All, My gut says that Anna is a scammer but my optimistic side wants to believe otherwise. I have been chatting with Anna for at least 6 months.”

Six months? holy cow, that’s persistent!

http://www.romancescam.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=1&start=0&t=12461

It seems when viewing this thread that a set of scammers really like using images from this specific porn star for their scam.

According to how she ends the email she is now officially my girlfriend. Wow, that was easy!

Enjoy her reply and soon I will post my follow-up reply to her!

Date: January 24, 2015 at 10:33:14 AM EST

From: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

Reply-To: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

To: Chris Pawelski

Subject: Hello!

Hello! Thank you for your letter. I’m so glad that you wrote the
letter! I hope to open the mail and see your message. It was nice to
find your letter. I think that we need to learn a lot about each
other. I think you will agree with this. So tell us about yourself a
little more. English I began to learn more before school, about a year
before I went to school. In kindergarten we were taught simple words
such as: table, chair, dog, cat and many other simple words. At the
university I went to the English language more thoroughly. I finished
“Tbilisi Pedagogical Institute named AS Pushkin” in my country’s
capital Tbilisi. My qualification – a teacher of English. I chose the
Faculty of Education, because I was attracted to working with
children. Since high school, I thought that the work of teachers noble
and important work, which I want to do. And then, I love children. I
can speak fluently in English. But sometimes I make mistakes. I have
my difficulties, that would be correct to write. Sometimes I look in
the dictionary, if I can not find the right word. I have concerns
about my accent. Perhaps for you, my focus will be fun. =). You could
tell how you will treat my accent? You will not scare it? It would be
interesting to know what you think about it. I like you already knew
from our correspondence, I love sports. This allows you to be healthy
and keep your body in shape. But it is important for every woman –
many are sitting on a diet, pace yourself to lose a few pounds. To me
this easier, I am engaged in fitness and twice a week I go to the
pool. Therefore, I can say without false modesty that I have a
beautiful body, which I’m not ashamed, unlike many girls with
complexes (there are such, I hope they will not come across). I love
the photo shoot, and if you want, I can send you some of the most
successful in my view photos. Just want to warn you that my photos
will be at the level of a professional. After university, my best
friend, her name is Anna, bought a good camera, and wanted to become a photographer. So we did a lot of photo session with her, and these
photos we have no one to show, and they were stored on the computer
Anna. My hard drive on the computer recently broke and I lost all my
pictures, so I had a photo taken from Anna. I think you’ll like.
Unfortunately, Anna was not able to become a photographer, because a
lot of competition, so she had to sell the camera in the future. And
now she has a family and children, and it works as an insurance agent.
Please tell me how you feel about the sport, practiced anything? I
spend free time mostly at home, reading books. Very fond of novels and
adventure. I watch soap operas, really like “Interns” is a hilarious
movie about the life of physicians, has just received a diploma and a
trainee in the hospital. From music I like to listen to Madonna, by
her beautiful songs are very incendiary dance! I am pleased to go to
the movies or cafes with friends, love to chat. Although, of course,
sometimes at work so exhausted that no strength to go anywhere. And
how do you spend your leisure time? Perhaps with the guys at the bar?
I think you are interested in my character. Itself is difficult to
assess, but friends say that I am a very quiet person. In people I
value integrity and honesty, and I did not like, if you suddenly find
out that the person lied to me. What are the qualities you like in
people? What is important to you in a woman in the first place? For me
the main thing – that was a good man. Such that he could take care of
others. Do you love cats? Or dogs? Well, now I’ll bombarded with
questions. I am writing you a letter from my friend Anna. She has
access to the Internet, and I’ll write to you from it. I want to make
our acquaintance continued. Maybe sometimes I do not get to answer you quickly. But I will try to write to you often. Ok? Now I finish the
letter. I am pleased that we continue to chat, I’m waiting for your
letters! Your passionate girlfriend Nalan!!!

I love the internet!

I love it for many reasons but one in particular is you can now search almost anything. In fact, one of the neat things you can search now are images. In fact either via Google image search (https://images.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl) or a website called TinEye (https://www.tineye.com) you can search a see if an image matches something already out on the internet.

With that in mind I decided to search the 3 images sent to me by my new potential Georgian girlfriend and guess what … two of the images got hits and they are evidently of Eve Angel!

Who is Eve Angel? Don’t worry, I had no idea either. Evidently she is a Hungarian porn star and model. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eve_Angel) I must admit I’m not too up on my Hungarian porn so it slipped past me. I am a bit disappointed though. Remember what Nalan said to me in “her” e-mail:

“I must say that I do not want to cheat a friend, hiding behind fake online nicknames. You know, many people want to look better than they really are, and for that choose a some exotic, completely ridiculous names…”

Hmm … I guess that doesn’t include using pics of a porn star to be pics supposedly of you. Nothing too fake about that … lol.

Do I out her? Not yet … Let’s see what “she” sends me in reply to my ramble to “her.”

This sort of reminds me of the scene from the Dirty Harry movie “The Enforcer.” Just fast forward to the 3:10 of this video clip. I bet this is what is taking place.

Subject: Re: Hello!

From: Chris Pawelski 

Date: January 21, 2015 at 9:48:54 AM EST

To: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

Hi Nalan,

Quite the pleasure to meet you!!!!

I very much enjoyed your detailed letter to me! Yes, I can’t stand fake online nicknames as well and greatly respect your honesty to me. I also appreciate the Gillian’s Islandesque type set from which one of your pics seems to be taken at! Very exotic and exciting. Do you know the Skipper?

I have relatives from Poland and the Ukraine so I know of Georgia. I don’t know much about the Zodiac, except that some of what I call “the greasy men” use that as pickup lines at the local bar. Are the signs of the Zodiac similar to the years of the Chinese? What happens if you are a Ram and I am in the Year of the Rooster? Who wins?

Let me tell you about myself, I am in my late 40’s happily married for nearly 25 years with two boys. I live in a small house and I am an onion farmer. That’s right, I grow onions (see: http://youtu.be/N2nx7wXIJnA & http://youtu.be/lEgHRF5loUQ). Do they have farms near you and what do they grow?

I must say I am very impressed with your English. I also love you do aerobics but I don’t know metrics so I have to ask my 12 year old to translate those numbers for me. I greatly admire your candor that you get sweaty while working out. Some don’t like to admit that. But, no sweat no gain I always say. Do you get sweaty when teaching English? I bet some of your students get sweaty in your class. Maybe you should combine English class with aerobics! If you did that I would do some exercises and improve on my grammar. It’s what we call a “win-win.”

My wife currently wants to keep me around for a while and is not really interested at this point in introducing a nubile young lady who gets sweaty while exercising into our current family dynamic but I will speak with her about it. You have lots to offer and there is a lot of potential upside. The downside: my wife will kill me. Do you like working outside in the dirt? We need farm laborers and could probably use you, especially to pick weeds and remove rotten onions. 

Below is a picture of me in the fields. It’s a selfie. Do you take selfies?

What sort of tv shows and movies do you like? Do you know anything about time travel, or space aliens? And what do you think about Pope Frank telling Catholics not to breed like the rabbit? Years ago my relatives bred like the rabbit but not anymore. What about in Georgia?

I don’t do drugs either but sometimes I drink moonshine and 4Loko, original formulation (google that). I also on occasion am interviewed for news stories about farming. I once tried to sell a bag of onions for $150,000 (see: http://youtu.be/O3QxqcQpx4Y) I think if Oprah had seen the story she would have bought it. 

What do you think of the New England Patriots deflating 11 of 12 of their footballs? 

You say you have no bad habits in connection with drugs. But, do you pick the nose and what about farting? 

Well, it has been fun chatting! 

Talk with you soon,

C

Date: January 21, 2015 at 8:39:11 AM EST

From: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

Reply-To: Nalan <gruzanangorg@yahoo.com>

To: Chris Pawelski <evep@warwick.net>

Subject: Hello!

Hello!

Nice to see your messages. It is very wonderful to start our
acquaintance. I hope you enjoyed reading this letter. I have a good
mood. I expect we met a lot of feelings, and the continuation of our
acquaintance. My name is Nalan. I must say that I do not want to cheat
a friend, hiding behind fake online nicknames. You know, many people
want to look better than they really are, and for that choose a some
exotic, completely ridiculous names… I live in the city of Rustavi.
My country called Georgia. My city has a population of approximately
122000 inhabitants. My city is located on the banks of the River
Kuri. The city is located 11 kilometers south-east of the Georgian
capital Tbilisi. I am 30 years old, my date of birth April 12, 1984.
According to the sign of the zodiac, I ram. However, many people say
that I look younger. I do not know if this is true. Here you are
looking at my photos, what you think about this? If interested, I can
say that with the growth of 177 centimeters weigh 53 kilograms, with
such indicators can be a model, but such a prospect, to be honest,
I do not like. Just in Georgia this business uses is not very good
reputation. Besides, I have a great job – I am a teacher in a primary
school. My specialization – English. I like to do aerobics, engaged
since childhood, love move cheered by catchy music. I enjoy it! Brag-
not my rules, but still, I note that dances allow you to monitor my
figure. Of course, it’s hard work, and often it happens that the
clothes are wet with sweat, yet spend activity, but what fun it is.
It is not difficult to guess that such a busy schedule, the work of the
teacher and aerobic exercise requires time. So I have no bad habits,
I do not smoke and do not do drugs, I’m just not necessary. Sometimes
it happens that while on vacation in the company of friends, I allow
myself a little light cocktails, and then more for the girls. Never
been married, no children. Perhaps then tell you more, why it
happened. I’m all about himself but about yourself! Please tell us
whatever you think is necessary: Tell us about the city where you
live, than to get involved. I am pleased to send you my pictures!
I hope that you will like them. And I look forward to your letters
and your photos! I really want to see them!
I look forward to your letter! Your new girlfriend Nalan!